Confessions from a (reformed) Cool Girl
Defining Emotional Intelligence: A Journey through two Hearts
There is Magic in the Mess
To quote a few passages from Pema Chödrön’s When Things Fall Apart that I read just after journaling the bones of this piece (hello, universe), “We think that if we just meditated enough or jogged enough or ate perfect food, everything would be perfect. But from the point of view of someone who is awake, that’s death. Seeking security or perfection, rejoicing in feeling confirmed and whole, self-contained and comfortable, is some kind of death. We are killing the moment by controlling our experience. Doing this is setting ourselves up for failure, because, sooner or later, we’re going to have an experience we can’t control.”
A Paradox of Being Human
To say I don’t know who I am is a fallacy. I am creating who I am. There is no version that already exists that I have to discover and then embody. I might not “know” who I am but that’s because I’ve misattributed knowing myself to being an exact science. I don’t know who I am; who we are is not an entity, it is an action. It’s not about knowing who I am, it’s about being me.
Live Like Nobody Is Watching
I previously interpreted the saying “dance like nobody’s watching you” as encouragement to get beyond human feelings of shame or embarrassment. I thought the premise was that we dance differently depending on whether people are watching. I couldn’t get beyond the part that involved people watching me (or not.) I used to think that the saying implies that we have an audience as we encounter these silly little lives of ours. Now, I disagree. I think I lost something vital in my being when I likened life to a live performance.
Floating Through the Impact Zone
I’ve gotten really good at appreciating the still waters, at seeing the beauty in life’s simpler beauties. When it gets tougher, though, that beautiful water gets sandier and cloudier and it’s hard for me to see all the goodness because I’m spending half my time underwater, diving under wave after wave.
I Love Now.
you can’t learn from what you’re living through if you don’t give yourself the permission to be PRESENT. take the time to get to know yourself, to experience this moment fully. it’s human to be so caught up in worries about the possible scenarios of the future and the mind replay-loops of the past that we forget to take a deep, grateful breath and see the LOVE and BLESSINGS unique to RIGHT NOW.